Hearts in False Keeping
by kittykatloren
Summary: The lack of her body beside his made him feel cold… but then a mad heat overtook him; the crazed spirit inside him that lay dormant flared into furious life as the full moon cast its silver glow through the tiny window, and he knew no more. Remus/Tonks.


**A/N: **Why do I always torture my two favorite HP characters? I need to write some happy Remus/Tonks times. But no, instead this comes out. Basically an AU-ish event that could have happened during Deathly Hallows. And fair warning, you'll hate the ending. I don't really plan to continue this oneshot, though, so yeah. x3

**Words: **3855  
**Characters:** Remus, Tonks, Snape, Bellatrix, others  
**Time: **Mid-Deathly Hallows (AU)  
**Genre:** Angst/Romance

**Disclaimer: **Everything you recognize belongs to J.K. Rowling, not me.

* * *

The day was pale with the rising sun, just a few minutes past sunrise. Only the barest edge of the sun glimmered over the lip of the horizon. The bright marble inside Malfoy Manor seemed to drink the morning and shimmer with its beauty, but on each wall, every floor, dark carpets and artifacts and dirt drowned every sunny sparkle.

Remus's heart hammered inside his chest, but he allowed that paralyzing fear to still and calm his body rather than incapacitate his mind. Tonks, next to him, had the fire of determination gleaming in her eyes.

"Well, what have we here?" drawled a familiar, cruel voice. "A half-breed and a mudblood, is it? How did you apprehend them?"

"They was stupid enough to use 'is name," growled the Snatcher who held Lupin. His breath was rancid.

"My darling niece!" shrieked another familiar voice. Lupin raised his head sharply and saw Bellatrix Lestrange, her eyes wide with glee. "How charming it is to see you again! How delightful it is that _I_ will be the one to kill you at _last!_" Her voice had risen in pitch until the last words were nearly inaudible, screeched like a banshee. Her wand arm shot up, and her lips were already forming the dreadful words; Lupin could almost see the green light already reflected in her eyes.

"No!" shouted two people at the same time. Lupin's throat seemed to tear from the inside. But what shocked him more was the identity of the second person who had spoken – Severus Snape emerged from the shadows next to Lucius Malfoy, the first person who had spoken.

Bellatrix's arm froze mid-strike, her mouth still hanging open as if she were about to speak. Her teeth were yellow and uneven. She moved nothing but her head as she turned to look at Snape, her eyes wide and dark despite the sunlight on her sunken face. "You object, Severus?" she hissed.

Slowly Snape walked towards them. His black eyes flicked over Lupin only once. He approached Tonks with an air of cool unconcern. Extending a hand to the Snatcher who held her, Snape received her wand, and in bitter irony pressed it instead of his own hard against her cheek, daring her to move. He stood offensively close to her, staring her down.

"Tch," he said as her lips trembled with an insult she couldn't throw at him. "Pretty."

Snape reached toward her body with his hand.

"Don't touch her!" roared Lupin.

He ignored Lupin entirely. His eyes still bore deeply into Tonks'. The hand that extended toward her touched not her body but her loose winter cloak, drawing it aside. A collective gasp emerged from the small crowd; the Malfoys, Bellatrix, and the Snatchers. The bump of Tonks' belly, though not yet big enough to hinder her, was nevertheless visible and obvious. "I thought so," said Snape. Bellatrix cackled.

"The bitch is going have a _puppy!_" she said. "Out of my way, Snape – I can kill both of them with one curse, all the better – _out of my way!_"

"Think for a moment, Bellatrix," said Snape. He slipped Tonks' wand inside his robes, and as he turned around to face his comrades, Lupin saw his eyes gleam with malice. "Has there ever before, in known history, been a werewolf child born, not made? And the girl…" He looked back at Tonks, his eyes flicking to her pink hair. "She has a special talent as well. She is a Metamorphmagus. What kind of powers might the offspring of such a union possess? And if that child were to be raised at the Dark Lord's beck and call…"

Comprehension was dawning in Bellatrix's eyes. Lupin's heart went cold with fear. He met Tonks' gaze, and he could see the same fear reflected there; neither of them could speak through the tightness in their chests.

"If we let her live until she bears the beast," Snape continued, "the Dark Lord will have gained not a follower, but a tool. A powerful dog to do his bidding. A mindless weapon - "

"Stay away from my wife!" shouted Lupin, unable to stand it anymore. "Stay away from our child!"

In an instant Bellatrix was in front of him, as if she had flown there, and her hand tightened around Lupin's throat. "_Your_ part in the production of this brat has already been done," she said. "What need do we have of a filthy animal half-breed like you, pretending to be a wizard, poisoning our world - "

"Bellatrix," Snape said idly. Lupin's vision was going hazy from lack of air; he couldn't see from whence Snape spoke. "Don't you prefer to play with your food before you eat it?"

"Why do you keep holding me back?" shouted Bellatrix. "I want to kill him!"

"Wouldn't it be rather more… entertaining… to let things play out for one more evening?"

"What?"

Snape looked out the wide window. The sun was still pale and low in the sky; and on the other side, an outline of the moon was just barely visible. It was nearly full. Even just looking at it made Lupin's heart throb; the blood in his veins seemed to tremble with anticipation, the wolf in him longing for release.

"We will need her to remain alive and in decent health for the time being," Snape said. Tonks let out what seemed to be an involuntary cry, of fury or fear, Lupin couldn't tell. "She will not cooperate with us. She may even find ways to harm herself or her offspring. Unless… we break her. Not physically… emotionally… take her under our control. Destroy all hope, all... _love_."

"Never!" yelled Tonks.

"Really?" said Snape, and even Bellatrix fell silent at the quiet power in his voice. "Have you ever seen your beloved husband in his transformed state _without_ the influence of the Wolfsbane Potion?"

Unwillingly, it seemed, Tonks fell silent. Her eyes flicked to Lupin, who merely stared at her with no idea what to communicate to her with or without words.

"I thought not. Perhaps you have forgotten what it truly means to be one of his kind? To lose all human thought, emotion, and memories, and to be possessed with nothing more than the thirst for murder. A werewolf could kill his parents, his best friend, his wife… his child… and feel nothing."

Now Lupin couldn't even bear to look at her. It was all true, all of it, and he wanted to shout at her to leave, to get away from him, to keep herself and her child safe at all costs; she could _not_ be near him -

"Bellatrix. Search his pockets."

He felt a hand force its way roughly into the inner pockets of his shabby robes. Glaring from narrowed eyes, Lupin saw Bellatrix, a twisted smile in her eyes, pull out a small vial that he kept on him at all times. She passed it to Snape, who uncorked it and held it under his nose.

"As I suspected," he said. "Wolfsbane. Brewed perhaps twelve hours ago."

Meeting Lupin's gaze squarely for the first time, Snape extended his arm until it was straight in front of them. His eyes were emotionless pits of black. The little vial hung suspended in the air exactly halfway between them. For a moment, the vial seemed to hover, as if the sudden inhalation and suspense of everyone in the room were pulling it so equally in every direction that it was motionless.

It only took a second for the vial to shatter against the ground. The potion splattered over the marble, thick and steaming, and Lupin unconsciously began to struggle against his captor, but it was hopeless; he was wandless and surrounded. _It was gone._

"Whoops," said Snape.

"You're in trouble now, aren't you, cousin?" shrieked Bellatrix. She cackled again. "What're you going to do when hubby tries to kill you and your precious _puppy_ - "

Tonks shot Lupin a wide-eyed glance. "No!" she screamed, and even though her eyes were fixed on him, her words were directed at Bellatrix. "It won't happen!"

"Should we give you a knife?" Bellatrix drew a short silver blade and pressed it to Tonks' neck, drawing just the tiniest drop of blood. Her expression was one of rapture. "See which one you kill first, yourself or the animal?"

"No, Bellatrix," said Snape. "We cannot risk physical harm to her. The basement is occupied, is it not, Lucius? Where else can we place the prisoners?"

Involuntarily bound now to Tonks' gaze, Lupin barely noticed Lucius's shivery, slippery voice murmuring to Snape. Perhaps because he was so blinded by his own fear, he couldn't tell what Tonks was feeling; he saw only a reflection of his own terror. He had never seen such an expression on her face before. Vaguely he noticed they were moving. He was being dragged, and Tonks was too; her Snatcher slapped her when she resisted, and their eye contact broke. Now he was alone with his fear, and it intensified.

The Snatchers tossed him into a room. Before he even had time to regain his balance or turn and face them, he heard the Death Eaters shout spells, and silver rope slammed into his back and pinned him magically to the far wall. The magic bonds felt cool and slippery at first, and he managed to struggle and twist until his back was against the wall rather than his face, then all of a sudden the wavy silver ropes solidified, still eerily chilled, but rock-solid. There was still magic in the bonds. They dug painfully into his skin, sharp and biting. The fear in his heart seemed to transport him to a different world, one of haze and uncertainty, of pain and premise.

A door slammed somewhere far, far in the distance.

"Remus! _Remus!_"

On his scarred, unshaven cheeks, he felt warm hands, and suddenly he came back to the present time and place. Tonks was right there in front of him, looking terrified. Her right cheek glowed pink with the Snatcher's handprint.

"Don't worry, Remus," she said firmly. "Don't worry, we'll get out of here, I won't let them – they'll never win – they won't! They won't break me, or you, or – I just _know_ they won't! I won't leave your side, Remus, I swear, I don't care – there's nothing they can do!"

Her eyes gleamed bright with unshed tears, but her expression and her tone were tenacious; the same kind of obstinacy she had shown when arguing her case for their love, their marriage, their child. She had won every one. She kissed him suddenly, and despite himself, Remus kissed her back, but it was brief. They were both too scared for such frivolity.

"You need to get away from me," he said. "Snape's right. You've never seen me without Wolfsbane."

"I don't care!"

"You don't understand!" he yelled. "If you're near me, I will kill you, Tonks! Do you think sheer strength of will can overcome my curse! Nothing can. Nothing. Selfishly, I… how do you think I would feel if I wake in the morning, and I see you there… broken, bleeding… and I did that…"

His voice cracked, and he could not continue. Tonks' hand trembled against his cheek. "We still have time," she said. "There's hours, still, until moonrise."

"And nothing we can do. This is silver… we are weaponless… we can't break it."

"No," she said. "But we have each other, Remus."

With unusual grace, she leaned against the wall next to him and rested her head on his shoulder. Side by side they remained, Remus chained but Tonks free by his side, and as she talked, some of the numb fear began to dissipate. She asked what he thought they should name their baby. Would it be a boy a girl? Remus said it would be a girl, but Tonks was convinced it would be a boy. They could name him after Sirius, perhaps – but no, Remus said, was Sirius really such a good namesake? Tonks laughed, and then suggested Ted, Theodore, after her father.

"And if it's a girl?" Remus said. He smiled slyly. "What about Nymphadora?"

"No!" yelled Tonks, so loudly that they heard the guard outside the door jump, and they both laughed. "You think _you're_ worried about passing on a curse - I'll never subject another kid to the kind of torture I've lived with!"

"I was joking, joking! But – it really is a lovely name, Dora - "

"Don't even try," she said, knocking him upside the head.

It grew uncomfortable, after a while, being pinned so tightly against the wall. Tonks stayed very close to him, squeezing his hand, talking cheerfully and animatedly. But as the hours wore on, he could hear the tightness in her voice, feel it in her slightly quivering hands. He thought about what she had said, about passing on a curse to their child… What if the Death Eaters were right? If their child possessed some new, dangerous power…

No, he could not think like that, not now. He could not bear to imagine the deadly possibility of what the Death Eaters were planning, though he could not envision any escape. Tonks was very quiet now, as if the looming reality had finally frightened her into silence. She wasn't scared of very much, Remus knew, but she was scared of losing him, of losing their child. His own heart clenched as if someone were trying to rip it in half at the very thought. What horrors would they inflict on her in trying to break her, even beyond this torture of letting her see him fully transformed… what pain would they subject their beloved child to? There had to be some way out… surely…

He could feel moonlight tickling on the back of his next. His heart throbbed.

"Dora," he said in a low voice. "Get away from me. Get away."

"Remus, I – I don't want to - "

"GO!"

The last thing he really registered was her scrambling away to the other side of the room. The lack of her body beside his made him feel cold… but then a mad heat overtook him; the crazed spirit inside him that lay dormant flared into furious life as the full moon cast its silver glow through the tiny window, and he knew no more, only kill, kill, _kill_.

* * *

She saw, as if staring at a stranger, as his familiar features stretched and distorted, his scream melding flawlessly into a growl of fury and hunger. She had seen him as a wolf before; the transformation was not what scared her. She usually held him and patted his fuzzy ears. He would bump her cheek with his nose, sweet and gentle.

But she had never seen him like this.

She knew, the second she jumped away, that he could no longer recognize her – the wolf glared through his human eyes, and then he was the wolf in body too, straining and growling and desperate. Her whole body shook with a combination of dreadful fear, worse even than the fear when they had been captured, and sheer shame that she had run away, left his side when he needed her now, more than ever…

The bonds were awkward on a wolf's body. His front legs were pinned strangely and clearly uncomfortably to his sides, but no matter how much he strained, they did not budge. Slowly, as if in a trance, Tonks began to walk back toward him, feeling the thin stream of moonlight alight on her face as well. She thought she could almost see herself reflected in the wolf's gleaming eyes as she drew close. He was still and snarling. She was so close she could have reached out and stroked his soft fur, like she always used to…

His head thrashed as he strained to snap at her, and she gasped, but she was not quick enough to avoid his claws when his back legs kicked and flailed. His claws tore through her pants and deep into her skin of her upper thigh, just inches from her belly, her baby. She crumpled to the ground, dragging herself further away from him, out of his reach.

There was nothing she could do but stare at him and shiver. As the moon rose higher in the sky, the streak of moonlight grew longer, capturing her in its heartless glow once again. In this light, she saw every one of his grey furs; they all gleamed silver… she made a game of counting them until there were too many too keep track of. His howling kept her eyes from closing. The gash in her leg occupied her hands as she tried to staunch the blood and bind the wound. The wolf continued to scream, clawing at his own sides with his pinned paws.

Tears dried on her face when she had no more left to cry. But she still could not close her eyes, could not sleep… not with the wolf's piteous howls always resounding, always echoing, in her heart. Her love was nowhere now.

* * *

Another man sat in another room in a broad swath of moonlight from a regal and wide window. Severus Snape waited there in personal silence, unperturbed by the howls from the room above him. Bellatrix Lestrange listened in unadulterated rapture, for the pain was resonant and unmistakable, and she understood and relished it with an expert ear.

As the night slowly melded into another bright morning, the howls began to quiet into whimpers, and then they heard nothing at all. When the moon had set, and the sun was fully risen with all its usual painfully bright splendor, Snape drew his wanted and pointed it at the ceiling. He continued to stare out at the blank morning, expressionless, emotionless.

"I believe he is human once more," he said. "There is no more need for the silver bonds. You may kill him soon, Bella… first, let him see and feel firsthand how he has hurt her, how she fears him, now…"

Bellatrix laughed madly, Snape's words like a spell around her as she imagined such beautiful agony.

* * *

He collapsed like a broken rag doll to the floor when the silver disappeared. His bleeding limbs did not have the strength to support him. It was all he could do to turn his head and open his eyes to see Tonks, sitting with one leg splayed and dark with dried blood. Darker even than that were her eyes, staring at him without really seeing, and that sight – more than the pain in his body, the fear in his memory – took hold of his heart and tightened around it and trapped him into terrified immobility.

It was some time before she seemed to realize that something was different. She gave a sudden start, though to Remus it felt like he had been watched her for hours; she appeared to have only just noticed. Her mouth fell open a little bit, and she began to crawl toward him at an timid pace. She was dragging herself awkwardly because of her leg. There were three narrow slashes there, like claws…

The reality of what must have happened nearly made Remus sick. But then she was a mere arm's length away from him… he could reach out and touch her if he found the strength, and if she did not run away first, filled with fear and disgust…

Her eyes found his at last. She was above him, since he was lying on the ground and she was sitting, and despite the dirt, the blood, the obvious exhaustion across her features, she seemed an angel to him in the pale, pervasive sunlight.

"Oh, Remus," she whispered, her voice cracked and dry. "You were gone… and now you're back."

She dropped her head so their foreheads were pressed together, and he could feel tears fall from her eyes onto his skin where they melted into his own tears. How long they remained like that, silently crying, he could not tell. He spoke next, remembering her bloody leg.

"Dora… I hurt you, didn't I?"

"Nothing," she replied. "It's nothing, Remus."

"Let me see."

With her help, he sat up, and he removed the makeshift bandages she had torn from her cloak. They stuck to the open wound, and she winced involuntarily as Remus's hands, exceedingly gentle, peeled away the fabric. Words of apology and shame burned inside his throat, but he knew that to say them would only pain her more; she had always refused to listen to his foolish, noble, and entirely asinine notions, as she called them… But it was all his fault that they were here. His condition made their children so desirable to the Death Eaters, did it not? How they would corrupt the child, it would all be his, Remus's, fault. And Tonks would suffer so too; she was already bleeding…

"Not like it's the only time you've made me bleed, hm?" she said with a brave attempt at a wink and a grin, but the pain in her leg was obviously too much. "You like to play rough in bed, you do. I like that about you."

"That's different," he said shortly. "This is…"

But he couldn't say it; he knew how it would infuriate her. This was exactly the reason why he worried so when he realized how attached they had both become to each other, when they first starting seeing each other, when they married. His hands trembled as he realized the cuts were barely three inches from her baby bump.

"Forgive me," he said as he dressed the wound.

"Nothing to forgive."

"I could have – I _would_ have - "

He fell silent. Footsteps echoed outside their door, and Tonks grasped him tightly, urgently.

"They didn't break us, Remus," she whispered fiercely as the footsteps grew louder, closer. "They thought they would, but they were wrong! I love you. I love our baby. They'll never win – they'll never beat us, never – "

With a crash, the door blew open, and it was Bellatrix Lestrange framed there, looking wilder and madder than before with dark circles beneath her eyes and a manic intensity in her movements. Lingering in the shadows lurked Snape. For a split second, the scene felt as if it had frozen, every person's heart skipping a beat in anticipation.

"Time to go," said Snape at last.


End file.
